Spiders lose spectacularly in last game of first losing season in 8 years

March 22, 2015

At least it wasn’t another come-from-ahead loss.

For the final game of the 2014–15 season, the remaining members of the Spiders roster still in town (or without playoff-contending other-team game conflicts) made the lengthy roadtrip to Vadnais Heights again, this time during the Minnesota Spring Snownami. With the Vadnais Sports Center hard enough to get to as it is, various members of the Spiders and Mastodons could be seen wandering the halls lost, looking for the mysterious rink 2 dressing rooms, only to be saved by a building services tour guide. By the time the puck dropped, most of the team was ready to go, even without an AHAPA-mandated warmup.

However, already in golf season mode, on the very first shift, the Spiders could be seen asking for a mulligan, as a point shot was tipped in front by a Mastodon well tied up by LaCosse, but still able to deflect the puck past McCormick. With 50 minutes and 35 seconds to go in the season, the Spiders were already in a one-goal hole.

Despite being out-possessed, out-hustled and outshot in the first (by 20–5), the Spiders survived the Mastodon onslaught, and were only down by a goal after one.

The second period was a different story, however. Early on, Henke was plucked from the player bench and sent to the box for interference. Seconds after he was sprung, the Mastodons let off another point shot that had 20/20 vision, deflecting off at least three bodies in front and into the Spider net. After another minute, Bredael went to the box for suggesting that the Mastodons’ #3 M. Olson keep his thoughts to himself. Once the penalty was killed, the Spiders got their own chance on the Power Play, which, once again, the Spiders should’ve declined, as the vulcanized hand grenade instead ended up in the Spider net.

A minute later, and another tape-to-tape turnover from the corner to the slot, this time by the goaltender, and it was 4-zip. Finally, with three minutes remaining the period, the Spiders got their first … shot on goal. A scrum in front, led by Berman, was the only sniff of the Mastodon net the Spiders would get for 17 minutes. To add insult to injury, scorekeeper Kimsey only “saw” two shots, but the Spiders were certain to correct the error of his ways, to avoid setting a new Spider record for fewest shots by period. Of course, the momentum never turned, and soon enough, the puck was back in the Spider net, 5–0 Mastodons to close out the worst 17 minutes* of the season for the Spiders.

(*The five-goal, turnover-laden, third period debacle against the Gold Rush only lasted 16:53.)

With a fresh start for the third, the Spiders got a power play after the Mastodons’ Gina Chavez hauled down Schroeder next to the net, only to get the brunt of the result, leaving with a shoulder injury, from which she would not return. “I felt like I just got in a car accident,” said Gina.

While it wasn’t that Power Play that did in the Spiders, the next one did, with yet another turnover, and yet another shorthanded puck in the Spider net, tying the Spiders franchise record for most shorthanded goals against in a game, last seen against the Renegades on 2/24/2008 in the 2007–08 season, incidentally, the last losing season for the Spiders.

Down by 6, the refs then took a timeout on behalf of the wheezing Spiders, and informed the captain that the mercy rule (Rule 710.1) could now be elected. However, the Spider captain wanted his team to get their money’s worth out of the final period of 2014–15 hockey, whatever that may entail. Of course, it entailed that same captain getting beat at his blueline while tangling with Mastodon skates, getting a two-minute reprieve from worsening his +/- rating.

Other than the five shots somehow registered in the third, while holding the Mastodons to six, and more attempts by #3 Olson to make the other team remember his name and number, that would be all she wrote for the Spiders’ 2014–15 season. Final score: 6-zilch.

It’s the season’s second shutout of the Spiders, because in total against the Mastodons this season, the Spiders scored exactly ZERO goals. While in the first game, in December, with the Royals’ Cavender subbing in net, the Spiders actually outshot the Mastodons. But tonight, the Spiders barely had possession of the puck in any zone, preferring to hand it over immediately to the pressing Mastodons. The final in shots was 34–13, a pretty accurate reflection of the tilted ice. (Two shutout losses in a season ties the original 2005–06 record, but that was broken by the 2007–08 season’s three shutouts that included the 15-donut to the Jets.)

Final C3 East Standings

This latest loss leaves the Spiders at ninth place in C3 East out of 11, finishing at 7–10–2–1, 17 points, and three full games out of the fifth and final playoff spot.

If it’s any consolation for the Spiders, while they were mathematically still in the playoff hunt before last weekend’s loss to the Royals, it turned out that even winning out wouldn’t have mattered, as the Spiders witnessed (or at least heard from the celebration on the ice) before the game. The Blade Runners, who needed a win to overcome their loss to the Royals on Wednesday and leapfrog them, beat the Marauders 5–2 on the same Vadnais sheet in the game prior to the Spiders/Mastodons, and knock the Royals back out.

The Spiders/Mastodons game was the last on the regular season schedule for C3 East. And C3 East therefore finishes up with the Maroons in first, the Mastodons in second thanks their victory, the Fighting Ice Fish, then the Gold Rush over the Blade Runners thanks surprisingly to the PIM tiebreaker, considering the Gold Rush are the perennial anti-Lady Byng winners.

Congrats to the Maroons, who take a C3 division title for the first time, having moved up to D1 (now C3) in the 2009–10 season.

The AHA playoffs get underway in two weeks, time enough for the usual rust to accumulate. However, with the Spiders not getting an invite for the first time in 8 seasons, the Spiders will instead start cleaning the rust of their golf clubs, and airing out their gear to hopefully prevent any further rotting stenches from infiltrating the 2015–16 Spiders dressing room.