Pick your metaphor in 11–1 romp

March 3, 2009

The Spiders put away the Snowmen by 11–1 margin at this Highland evening game.

The question tonight isn’t who scored (8 players), or who got penalties (0 players) for the Spiders. It’s who didn’t score, and who didn’t get penalties:

• Penalties:

  Zero, even from the normally generous Spiders stick corps, especially LaCosse.

• Not scoring:

  Of the 13 skaters who beat the traffic to Highland Park, St. Paul, tonight, five couldn’t beat the traffic in front of the net:

  • Aaron Bedessem, who instead drew penalties by putting his head out for the taking.
  • Rob Droullard, who instead got an assist, and was playing for the first time on the right wing.
  • Jeremy Litton, who had a top-shelf sure thing denied by a grinding Chris Flannery’s stick.
  • Eric Ackermann, who still got an assist, and a stinger to the neck for good measure in the third.
  • Bruce Gustafson, subbing tonight, who couldn’t get his legs properly stretched in time for the game.

The Snowmen’s highlight came on second-period break by their second-leading scorer J. Fischer, who threaded the porous defensive pair of Litton and Hilden to snap one and beat Amber, breaking her shutout streak at two games, as well as her contract cash incentives.

Otherwise, it was all Spider offense and puck control against the now-0–18 Snowmen. And for those keeping score:

• First period:
  • Paul LaCosse, on a changeup from the point, for his second career AHA goal, assisted by Michael “Career Night!!!!!!!!” Armel and Ryan “four-point night but didn’t need to brag about it like you know who” Herman.
  • Ryan Herman, from Jay Hilden and Michael “Career Night!!!!!!!!” Armel.
• Second period:
  • Chris Flannery, from Cory “Waste Management” Vandenberghe.
  • Chris “Single Shift” Pettengill, on assist from Cory “Waste Management” Vandenberghe.
  • Chris “Single Shift” Pettengill, 31 seconds later on the same shift, snapping one unassisted.
  • Cory “Waste Management” Vandenberghe, on assist from Aaron “I just set up Cory” Bedessem.
• Third period:
  • Chris Flannery, from Aaron “I just draw penalties for Droullard’s line” Bedessem, and Jeremy Litton.
  • Michael “Career Night!!!!!!!!” Armel, from Ryan Herman and Eric “and 99 on second assist” Ackermann.
  • Mike “Puck Hog” Johnson, from Ryan Herman.
  • Michael “Career Night!!!!!!!!” Armel, unassisted.
  • Jay Hilden, from Rob “Thanks for the Power Play, Aaron” Droullard and Chris “Single Shift” Pettengill.

Yes, Amber’s two-game shutout streak comes to an end, but she still got five saves out of the deal. The Spiders put a season-high 40 shots on goal (14–13–13). And allowed a franchise-low six shots, with also tying a franchise-low single shot in both the first and second periods (1, 1, 4).

The Spiders (15–0–2–1) add to their lock on first place at 33 points, with a five-point advantage in the standings over the second-place Diablos, who still have a game in hand, at 28 points.

Next up for the Spiders, the penultimate game of the regular season, a rematch with the ever-dangerous 9–5–3–0 Lumberjacks, who hold a one-point lead over the Yellow Jackets for fourth place, the last slot for a playoff berth. The previous games resulted in a 2–2 tie and a 4–2 Spider win.